Seriously.
Why did you have to make that vomit splash in my face?
I'm done with cheap vodka.
Why did that man with the creepy hat hit on me at Goodwill? I seriously said, "dude, I was looking at your hat."
To quote a wise woman, "get your hands the fuck off my heart!"
They say for thinkers life is a comedy, for feelers life is a tragedy.
I have to say... this shit is downright funny.
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